I have been battling this addiction for over 4 years now. I started out taking a 1/2 of a 500mg vicodin once a week, just when I got a really bad tension headache. I quickly realized I felt ?good? when I took them, so gradually started taking more often. That continued for about a year & a 1/2. Then I got pregnant. I was able to stop cold turkey, however I did take a total of about 5 pills throughout my whole pregnancy when aches & pains were really bad. I have always had a high tolerance for pain medications, so otc tylenol DOES NOT help me. So the minute you deliver a baby, guess what, they prescribed me a shiny new rx for darvocet. So since the day my baby was born in Aug. of ?07, I have not had 1 clean day. I have extreme depression, & little to no help or support from my husband. The pills make me feel not so sad, & gave me the energy I needed to ?handle my business?. Over time my habit has increased tremendously..& I?m now taking at least 20 10/325mg Norco daily. I do have my own rx, but that lasts me all of 4 or 5 days, so then I start my ?hunt? for a score. I buy 4 different peoples rx?s & am spending over $700 monthly on just the pills. Not to mention that while I?m on pills I smoke a pack a day, drink red bull & Starbucks like there?s no tomorrow, & have manic shopping habits. I have NO self control. My habit is costing my family everything we have. We can longer pay our bills, & my kids don?t have a mommy. The energy the pills used to give me went away a long time ago, now I barely have the motivation to shower. I can?t live like this anymore. I have hit my bottom, & I HAVE to quit. We can?t afford rehab, & my husband makes to much $$ to qualify for any special ?scholarships??so basically I?m screwed. The other night I decided to talk to my G?pa about helping us to pay for a detox program. It was one of the hardest things I?ve ever had to do. My G?pa thinks so highly of me, & to tell him that I?m a drug addict was so painful. He has bailed us out sooooo many times financially in the past, he just can?t afford to pay for it. I should?ve asked him for help a long time ago?but?woulda, coulda, shoulda isn?t going to help now.So I basically ?told on myself? so now I have no other option BUT to quit. Since I can?t afford to pay for rehab, I have to do this at home. The plan is, my mom & husband are going to take a week off work & basically nurse me back to health?but I?m SCARED!!! I?ve heard so many horror stories.I?m writing this in hopes that someone out there has some advice for me. I?m terified of the pain, diahrrea, nausea, bone aches, insomnia?all of it. I?ve read all these ?recipes? that are supposed to help with wd symptoms, but believe it or not, I?m scared of taking drugs?I know funny right. I would like to be able to do this with ibuprofen, tylenol pm, immodium, & hot baths?.but is that just ridiculous for me to even think that possible?? I don?t want to use suboxyn, or valium or any other substance to wd because my addictive personality will become addicted to them..I just know it.If anyone out there has any advice for me..PLEASE help. I?m planning to do this the week after Thanksgiving, I would like to be back to my normal self by Christmas.
Ok, I cannot tell you how many times I?ve seen this go wrong. Death is a very common side effect. The seizures alone could kill you. I know you can?t afford this but you can?t afford to leave your kids w/o a mom and a husband w/o a wife. Take a loan, go in debt. If you make enough money that you don?t qualify for gov?t assistance than you have some resources. Don?t do this solo. I promise you something real bad and scary will happen, someone will dial 911, you?ll get rushed to the hospital, and the bills will come anyways but there will be the chance you?re already dead.
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